Y?

Home in my golden mustard colored bedroom alone with my son. The sun doesn't come through the windows this time of day. It skips over the street and breaks into the trees across the road. It seems strange that I don't know those woods and I wonder if I ever will. A robin flies into the front door window repeatedly. It's sickening, the thud. I suppose it thinks it's being all heroic and macho fighting off a very determined foe. I'm convinced it's a male and this frankly ridiculous behavior is innate. It worries me. I watch my sweet and gentle daughter play doctor over and over and kiss her baby brother (somewhat) softly first thing in the morning and last thing at night and I wonder how different they will be. I see crazy crazy kids out there (boys and girls) bashing each other and screaming for the sake of screaming and I think thank God I've got off lucky. Beanie has her two and a half year old tendencies, her tantrums are fairly regular these days but still she's just so gentle. She's so cuddly and loving and I melt when I put her down for a nap and she smiles as she drifts off almost nose to nose with me holding both my hands. And now, my secret fear of the Y chromosome is exposed. Looking down at Minnow, his soft little breaths, his animal squeals, his sweet cry.... it seems so un-masculine. How do I keep him this way? How do I stop the world from corrupting this perfect being into thinking he needs to be more than just a body of love? Is it possible to keep him from flying again and again into hard glass to prove himself? Can my nurture mold him as much as nature? He is surrounded by sensitive yet strong men (or strongly sensitive men? haha) so I'm holding my hopes high.